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This is a blog-post I never expected to write, but here I am, typing away, wondering what you are thinking.  I know that your world doesn’t, nor should it, revolve around my weekly blog-posts.  But, from your comments, questions, and encouragement, I have been blessed to know that this blog has meant something to others.  It hurts to let it go, but it’s that season in my life.

newthingKatieGarden

I began this blog to discover what it was God was calling me to and along the way I realized I really wanted to help you discover what God was calling you to.  I tried to release a new post twice or at least once a week, and with some necessary breaks, I accomplished that.   I wanted to use this blog to connect with you, figure out how I could best serve you, and the funny thing is, now that I know, I have to let go of one of this, my main tool in discovering that.

Last fall, I took a gigantic leap of faith and went to the Platform Conference.

(You can read more about my journey here: https://jacquelinevroe.wordpress.com/2013/11/06/im-done-arguing-with-god/)

I was terrified, but it was a wonderful, stretching experience because I could hear God asking me, “Do you take what I have called you to do seriously? Or are you just playing?” I was surrounded by entrepreneurs, many outrageously successful from my vantage point, but we were all apart of the same mission, reaching the right people with the message we were burdened with… only, by the end of the conference, it no longer felt like a burden.  I will never forget how Michele Cushatt sent us off or how many times since she has let me know, as I trust she does all her followers, that she believes in me.  God used her and several others to help me recognize that whether I reach one or millions, I am simply to be obedient and professionally step forward, honestly sharing my hope for each leader and disciple-maker I help equip.

I want to say EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED for me since this realization, but that is overstating things.  Even though I am the queen of drama, I want to be honest with you.  The essentials are the same:  My name is the same, I am still a sinner saved by an extraordinary God, married to a flawed and awesome husband who is still a pastor in a small town with three imperfectly perfect precocious children.  I am still mourning the loss of my mother, who passed away only nine months ago (can it be that long since she and I talked? hugged?) I am still writing scripts that I fear I can never act…

But this has changed; together, with my husband leading me, I have realized how to use my silly and strange gifts to recognize opportunities, to embrace them and beg God to use me to be a blessing daily.  I am now scheduling a tour, taking on coaching clients, teaching at a coffee-shop once a month, starting a scrap-booking/crafting group to make room for celebrating life.  My husband has busily worked to finish getting certified as a Biblical Counselor, Church Consultant, and his coaching clientele is growing as well.  Out of the overflow of the ministry God has called us to in our small town, God is doing something bigger with our family and through our family.  I am nearly bursting, waiting to see what is next and how He will incorporate all we have to reach out, possibly outside the borders of our nation, to empower other disciple-makers.

Tuesday morning I sat down and began writing and writing and writing.  Each post was a little over 500 words, which you respond best to.  Each post was based on insight from my life that I pray will be useful in yours.  But I won’t be posting any of them here.  Instead, the posts will continue to be edited and refined until we launch our website at Relentless Ambition.  We will have a separate page connecting with women through our branch Veritas Women’s Ministry, recognizing the unique language, interests of women.  I cannot wait to one day post a link to books we will one day publish!

So, I am jumping up and down with excitement, but I am trembling with fear.  What if you don’t follow me to what I perceive as the next level?  What if I lose you along the way?  I fear shutting this blog down, but I mustn’t try to straddle these commitments. I know I must not live in the land of “what-ifs,” God has called me to a hope that does not disappoint.  It does not mean worldly success, but if I am obedient, then I will grow more like Him.  I pray that if you follow my example, you will, too.

So, when I post our new link, the last blog post I will post here, will you follow?  Will you trust that God is going to use us to equip you to be the disciple-maker He longs for you to be?

Please comment and let me know if you are praying for us on this journey!  We will be praying for you on yours!

For further meditation:

Isaiah 43

Last night my middle daughter sat in my lap and I sang to her a song out of Isaiah 43.  She said she missed being little and having me comfort her with this song after nightmares.  Reading the rest of the chapter reminds me that I am a lot like Israel was, prone to wander and make false gods to worship.  But I have been saved from my sinful, aimless ways to walk straight, to praise and worship our holy and righteous God.  He has saved us and wants to do something new in our lives – what is He doing in yours?

Though I am not affiliated with Michael Hyatt http://michaelhyatt.com/ or Michele Cushatt http://michelecushatt.com/ in any way, I encourage you to check out their resources.  God has used them to encourage many leaders and teach the necessity of generosity.  I have certainly continued to be blessed by their insight and examples.  If you feel the Platform Conference might be useful, here is the link to discover more:

http://www.platformconference.tv/

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